The Pessimistic Ballade of Arbitrary Behaviour
Nathaniel thought the way ahead was clear. He looked at Clementine (a silly name) and softly said "My only love, will you be mine? A word, a nod, a glance, a sign that I'm your Jack and you're my Jill?" But then he swallowed turpentine for people do as people will. She laid him on her mother's bed. (Her dad had gone to Lichtenstein in search of mirth and maidenhead, which some considered out of line.) She called the priest at ten to nine. He leaned across the window-sill and purred, "Your arse is very fine!" for people do as people will. He died (Nathaniel) but, instead of grieving, she went out to dine (that's Clementine) on garlic bread and marinated porcupine. She choked (of course) upon a spine that lay concealed in fronds of dill. The waiter gave her shoes a shine for people do as people will. Rational souls, though you decline to heed my dismal codecil, pull up a chair, uncork the wine for people do as people will.