Ye see them in Byres Road sniffin thur beer
luk lord an lady muck wi fancy wine.
Caa thursels Camra, Ah've anither name
fur fowk that try'n mak something whit it's no.
Oh Ah've hud proaper wine, no yer El D.
Ah wis in Bennydorm in ninety two.
This wee Spanish chancer tuk a shine
an tried tae get us plestered oan the rid -
Pair wee sowell, Ah hud tae help him hame.
Me n'is mammy goat him tae his bed
an hit the toon. Wee daurlin! he wis nice -
said the things a lassie likes tae hear.
Bult luk a whuppet tae, nae erse at aa,
couldny hump a barrel. 'S up wi yous?